If Only Words Could Save Me Now
by Time-Wine
Summary: Sirius Black lives a lie. With all the memories of the past that he holds, only one good one remains. There is so much he has to carry on his shoulders every day, but he must hide it. Why does he soothe himself with lies? Why must be stay away from who he
1. The Beautiful Letdown

"**I just wanted to help!" she told him in the most gentle voice she could muster, "I just wanted to make sure you would be all right. I needed to know what was wrong—"**

Sirius cut her off, his eyes narrowed. "You don't know me, Lia," he told her. She felt her brain stop and her heart melt to her stomach. His voice was so stern, firm, quiet, yet so full of bitterness. Her breathing eccelerated as she fought back the waterworks. Everything was happening so fast. She just stood there, transfixed, staring up into the dark brown eyes of the only man she had ever loved.

"You don't know the first thing about me, my life, or my family. You are simply an audience to my act...As is everyone else," he continued in the same voice as before, but with so much emotion, "Don't try to save me. Don't even bother to care. You don't know me and no matter what you say, you won't get through to me." he finished powerfully. There was a tone of finality in his voice. Lia didn't understand. It was as if he had been hiding for so long that now there was no way out. He had been running for too long and now he was too tired to carry on this way.

They stood, looking into each other's eyes and Sirius, choosing not to see all the hurt in Lia's hazel blue pools, turned his back to her, and walked out of the Gryffindor Common Room. His broad shoulders and handsome figure was the same as they'd always been and the window into his soul was cold as ice like no one would have ever imagined. A piece of that ice melted. Sirius Black shed a tear as he strutted down the hall as though nothing was hurting him, as though his heart wasn't gone, and as though he really never felt more empty in his life than at that moment.

**Lia's legs trembled when the Gryffindor door slammed shut. Her chest heaved with emotion as she forced herself not to cry. I should've left him alone! She cried to herself within her thoughts. Her heart pounded, and most suddenly she sank into the couch behind her, covering her thin mouth in her hands. Her once alert, electric eyes, were now tired, worn out, the fire in them gone. They collected tears deep within her soul, blurring her vision, and she blinked letting them go. The warm droplets overwhelmed her cheeks, stinging all the way down. Lia sobbed and sobbed, and cried until her chest ached with the understandle pain her heart could take no more of and slept on that couch; her tears became her lullaby that night.**

What's the way of love?  
Tell me your fiction  
Tell me your lies  
Say to me now, you'll never forget this night  
I'm feeling emotionless   
My head's so clear  
My enemies aren't, the one I fear  
You know your kiss confused  
This troubling soul  
And I found out   
That we're all breaking hearts  
That we're all broken hearts 

If only love could save us all  
If only hearts didn't have to fall  
We can't mislead to make things right  
So instead we'll sleep alone tonight

What's the way of love?  
You are thinking I'm crazy  
But you're blushing of lust  
I've heard a lot of nice things,  
but tell me which ones I'm to trust?  
These walls we made are glass  
And they have been known to crack  
But until then  
You'll keep pushing my way  
And I'll keep pushing you away

If only love could save us all  
If only hearts didn't have to fall  
We can't mislead to make things right  
So instead we'll sleep alone tonight

If you want to take a chance  
And try to make things right  
You better have a reason to be loved  
We all want something more  
And it is worth fighting for...

If only love could save us all  
If only hearts didn't have to fall  
We can't mislead to make things right   
So instead we'll sleep alone tonight

And if somehow fate were in my hands  
Would it be enough to understand  
Why we feel lost in a world so small  
If only love could find us all...


	2. History

**It was the first memory he had; or at least the first good one anyway. Severus Snape had shoved him in the hall, and his books had toppled right out of his arms. He scowled, trying to hide the fear he felt as everyone started laughing. Being only ten years old brought him to his old insercurities and after being put in Gryffindor instead of Slytherin like it was planned, he felt even more alone. His parents would not be very pleased. Still, as people around him pointed, one person, one girl, bent down to help him.**

**Her naturally pinkish lips had given him a smile. "Here you go," she had told him in the sweetest voice as she handed him his Transfiguration book. He took it, staring at her feeling mesmorized. He remember everything about her that day. She had her long, jet black hair tied back, and her hazel eyes were the most beautiful. At that moment he could see flecks of darker blue in them, and they were so deep...Just so deep. He knew he had made a mental note to himself to ask his father if there was a way to see angels at Hogwarts, and not just ghosts. He was sure this girl was one, she had to be. He could still see the picture of everything about her in his mind; pettite figure and her incredibly clear, and soft looking face. He could sense that she had lived a million lives, though she was as young as he. She was _so_ young at that time... **

He watched the memory play in his mind again, watching her stand up and walk away to her class. He hadn't even known her name at all. At that time things had been so simple. His mind was so pure, and his soul was not yet poisoned.

He knew that there was a little bit of darkness infested in every human mind, but that it was their choice whether to let it expand or to leave it as it was. His mother had planted seeds of hate inside him. He could never explain all the loathe he now felt towards her. Having to come home in the summer became unbearable. It was never easy. Stress overflowed inside him every single day of his life, but he was forced to hide it. He was still, after all these years, pretending.

So, when times got hard he would remember the memory and how peaceful it had been at that time when everything was right and when nothing had happened yet. He remembered the times when he could still laugh and smile, and his soul would do the same. He knew he was being eaten up inside, but he didn't care anymore. He felt like an empty shell all the time, just walking along, laughing and telling jokes, when inside him there was nothing. He was just blank; forced to feel pain inside. He was tired.

**He wished his father was still there to help him. Sitting here now, he could clearly see the face of his old man as he walked inside the house from work that summer. It had been right after his own first year at Hogwarts. He had never really known what it was his father did, but he had always felt a sense of pride. He ran into the arms of his dear daddy that day, so much love in his heart that had been for so long gone. **

"'Ello there Sirie! How's my youngest doing today?" he had asked in that jolly voice he always carried around. He could feel the roughness of his father's shaven face as he quickly kissed his cheek. He had been so happy. And then his mother had appeared in the doorway, looking angry again. Had she drunk once more? Had his sister done something again? Or was it father again who had come home late for dinner? Her dark eyes were narrowed and her long, bushy eye brows were furrowed. Her oily hair fell down to her hips. It looked as though she hadn't showered in days. And of course, the blood red scar on her cheek and the black marks under her eyes. God, it was so sad how she had come from looking like the most beautiful thirty year old mother, to the wash out who looked like fifty.

His father had turned to her. "What is it?" he asked looking impatient. Things hadn't been going well. Mother was always crazy, drunk, yelling, complaining. They had been fighting.

Sirius realized later that he couldn't have possibly been nervous at the time because at the time he had no idea what was about to happen. He had watched everything happen, too. He had watched his father scream, he had watched his mother laugh. He had been right in the room that day. He hated his mom forever for it. He would never forgive her. How could she?

Sirius Black was scarred forever when his mother shot her husband, Sirius' only savior; his hero.


	3. Friends Will Be Friends

Thanks for the review-D Really appreciate it. This is kind of a long chapter. Haha. Enjoy.

**Sirius cursed inside his own mind. Why did that memory haunt his mind more than anything in this world? God, it still hurt so damn much. It wasn't fair. His father had been such a good person, such a good man.**

**Lia had always said that Sirius was going to have a great life. She had told him that he was a good person, such a wonderful person at heart, and that guarranteed him a bright future. It had made him smile, yet he knew it was not true. His father was shot. He had done nothing wrong and he was shot. **

**Sirius felt a lump form in his throat. He threw the doors of the library open with a slam. He earned a scowl from several students trying to study in the far corner. He didn't care. Sirius walked quickly over to the first bookcase he saw and grabbed the first book he could get his hands on.**

**Sirius pulled a chair out away from the table and sat down. He looked up, as though to make sure none of his friends were in there. He smiled to himself. He doubted James even knew there was a school library. No, the tables were empty besides the one with the several studious boys and girls (probably prefects or head boys and girls); there was only one circular one occupied. Lily Evans sat there quietly to herself. She was reading. **

**Sirius sighed. He knew Lily wouldn't talk to him; not like it mattered. Lia was good friends with Lily. Sirius looked at his book. He pretended to read all the time. It was a way to make people leave him alone when he needed it. Being Sirius, he had to pretend. That was a given.**

**He thought of Lia, beautiful, amazing...His Lia.**

**"_Ya know, you don't fool anybody with that reading thing of yours,_" She had told him with the biggest grin on her face. Sirius remembered sweeping her into his arms and holding her close on the couch. His cheek had touched hers. They hadn't said anything more. Sirius had had a lot on his mind that day. He hadn't told her. He gulped. He couldn't.**

**Lia had been the only one who had ever been able to make him happy and he had pushed her away. He had been so afraid of hurting her, so afraid of damaging her with his destructive past, that he had ruined it. He had walked away from her like she was nothing. He had done the oposite of what he wanted to do. He _had_ hurt her.**

**Sirius gulped and didn't blink. His eyes were starting to water. It wasn't fair. Nothing seemed right. He had screwed up again. _That's all I ever do, _he thought to himself, _with Lia, with my family, with myself!_**

**"Don't bother," said the oh-so-familiar voice of James Potter.**

**Sirius formed a smile with his lips and put the book down. He rubbed his face with his hands roughly, letting out some air. "Hey, man," he answered.**

**CD2B48CJames put a hand on his friend's shoulder and gave it a shake. "Like I was saying," he continued, "I already know when you pretend to read. Don't bother my friend."**

**Sirius gave a weak laugh and slowly closed the book. He stared at the cover, not wanting to look at James. He ran his finger over the title, not reading it, just thinking about everything.**

**Lia had just tried to help him. He had thrown it all away, but she had tried too hard to get inside him. She wanted to know him and everything about him, but he couldn't. He couldn't ever tell her, and it had been wrong of her to try to find out. He pushed all these things into his mind.**

**"iWhat/i is wrong?" James asked in a worried voice.**

**Sirius looked up into his face. He sighed as James raised his eye brows suggesting that he wanted an answernow. "Same old," he answered lifelessly.**

**James gave a big laugh, "Oh right Sirius, same old. You never tell me what's wrong in the first place. Which is fine, you are entitled to your privacy, but man...We care about you and that's why we ask. We want to help you."**

**Sirius gulped and opened his mouth to speak, but said nothing. He looked up at James. He felt overwhelmed. Too much had happened today, and he did not want to start a fight with James. He wouldn't lose his best friend. No.**

**He wanted Lia back. It's all he thought about. Lia, Lia, Lia, Lia—the one he went to when stress got to him. Everyone kept trying to help him. His stomach flipped and a lump formed in his throat.**

**He chocked it down. "I-I-I don't need any help, James. I'm fine," he told James looking him in the eye and he added with a laugh, "I'm just really tired."**

**James studied him. It was obvious that he didn't believe Sirius, but he said nothing against it. He carried the same hurt look that Lia had. Sirius looked up and almost jumped up with joy to see that Lily Evans was coming towards them to stop this conversation. He thought he would break at any second.**

**James turned around to see what he looking at. He gave Lily a sleek grin. "Hello my beautiful, how can I help you?" he asked her in his nonchallant voice standing up and pulling a chair out for her.**

**Lily put the book she was reading to her chest, her lips pursed in annoance. "There's a Head meeting in Dumbledore's office tomorrow at six. Be there this time because it's actually important," she told him seriously.**

**"Which 'head'?" Sirius asked with a grin. He put his hair away from his face.**

**Lily gave him a dirty look. "You two better grow up sooner or later. No one's going to marry a couple of d!cks like you who think you are hillarious. Girls get tired of it, you know. At first it's charming, but then after they see that's all there is out there, they get really sickened. You will both end up childless and alone,"**

**"Well, fingers crossed yeah," Sirius told her. James snorted a laugh and let it out. He elbowled Sirius' shoulder.**

**Lily plainly smiled at them. "No one can be alone," she told them quietly and with that she walked off with Sirius and James staring at her retreating back.**

**James sat down again and laughed loudly. "My God Padfoot! Couldn't at least let me get some brownie points with her!"**

**"Like you ever will. I don't get why you bother with her," Sirius told James honestly.**

**James looked down at the oak table for a moment and then looked back up at Sirius with a soft smile. "I bother with her for the same reason you bothered with Lia. I also bother her for the same reason I bother with you," he said earning a confused look from Sirius. He continued, "I could've already given up on you. Thousands of times I've asked to go over to your place. You said no. I stopped asking. I want to know what's going on with you, but you never tell me. Anyone would've been frustrated as heby now. I'll always be your friend Sirius, and I'll be there whenever you need me; but I won't force you to tell me."**

**Sirius looked at his best friend for a second, stunned. He smiled gently and held out his hand, "Thanks man."**

**They high fived and James smiled back at him. "No problem. Now, let's go play some quidditch. I need a lot of self esteem after getting turned down exactly eighteen times in one day," he said with a sigh as he stood up.**

**Sirius gave his hooty laugh. "We should go do some growing up because that seems to be what girls want."**

**They looked at eachother and burst out laughing as they walked out of the library.**


	4. Secrets

"Give this to Sirius, will you?" Lia asked Remus in the common room later that day. Lia looked around, just to make sure that no one who was good friends with Sirius was watching them. Remus and she would always be friends, she knew that. That's how she had met Sirius, through her Remus, she thought with a smile. They had known eachother since they were both five years old and nothing was about to drag them appart.

Remus took the envelope she was holding. He studied the beige envelope with the words: 'To Mister Sirius Black' in fancy lettering with curiosity. "What is it?" he asked with pure wonderment as he ruffled his sandy brown hair away from his electric blue eyes cooly.

Lia sighed and sat down next to him. Remus could tell that she was worn out just from looking at her face and into her hazel pools. "It's an Honor's Dinner thing. Dumbledore didn't know that Sirius and I had broken up so he gave it to me to give to Sirius and—"

"Wait, what!" Remus exlcaimed, putting his hand up to stop her, "You and Sirius are broken up?" he asked, his eyes wide with concern. Lia nodded, looking into the fireplace. "I'm so sorry, Lia."

She nodded, and said nothing. She didn't want to think about it. Never ever again. "Yeah, anyway, please give that to him. He made it as did a couple of other kids. You had to get perfect grades all year long, nothing bellow the best," she said with a smile.

Remus gave her a gentle smile and put the envelope down on the coffee table in front of him. "You helped him get those grades," he told her.

Lia simply nodded. "Yes, but only because I knew he was capable of it," she said, not looking at Remus, but at her hands. Quickly flipping her head up to give Remus a 'see you later' look, she turned to leave. Remus looked at her for a second and then back down the envelope on the table with furrowed eye brows. Then, Lia spoke from the staircase.

"You know," she started, signalizing Remus to turn back. When she had his attention she continued, "I always believed in him, no matter what. I didn't give up on him no matter how much it hurt that he kept so many secrets from me. I loved him, and that was all I needed to keep me going at night."

Remus gave a deep sigh, giving her a sincerely sympathetic look. His eyes were warm. He said quite clearly but quietly, "Sometimes you have to keep secrets, Lia."

She stood there for a second, observing him. It looked as though he had something more to say, but no. Remus gave her a friendly smile, an encouraging one, and turned back to the book that was on his lap. Lia furrowed her eye brows as she walked up the stairs, but then let it go. Humming the only song she could think of that could relax her, she lay in bed with her eyes closed trying to drain her mind of all thoughts and of all worries. Life was easier, much easier, once you stopped struggling so much.

And I didn't think about

All the ways I hurt you and myself

And I wouldn't say a thing to you

I keep it to myself in

My mind

And I can't stand without you

And I won't find the answers

When you're gone

But it's over to you

I can't find the answer when you're gone

And it's over to you

But you can't find the answer where you are

And you know I need you now

And this ain't easy to admit

But no one needs to know

What goes on behind

The door in my room

I'm kicking through the

Walls in my mind

And I can't stand without you

And I won't find the answers

When you're gone

But it's over to you

I can't find the answer when you're gone

And it's over to you

You can't find the answer where you are

I won't tear you down

I won't tear you down

To get into the world you wanted

I'm kicking through the walls

But no one can believe

In things that never change

But it's over to you

I can't find the answer when you're gone

And it's over to you

You can't find the answers where you are

And it's over to you

I can't find the answer when you're gone

I can't find the answer when you're gone

I can't find the answer when you're gone

I can't find the answer when you're


	5. The Plan

**Sirius sighed. "An Honors Dinner?" he asked with a disappointed look on his face.**

"**Don't be too excited," Remus said sarcastically with a grin as he raised his eye brows. James slapped Sirius' back with a laugh. **

**Sirius chuckled as he opened the envelope. Peter, Remus, and James all gathered around pulling themselves closer to Sirius' seat in Hogsmead.**

**Sirius raised his eye brows and read it aloud in a voice of moarning and a bit quickly, "_Dear Mr. Sirius Black, in honor of your enormous achievements_—They should count our Marauders' map in 'achievements'!"**

**They all laughed, then James said in a more quiet voice, "And the fact that we are all animagus…I mean, damn we are good."**

**They laughed, and Sirius continued, "_You have been invited to have a lovely dinner with your teachers and headmaster, Albus Dumbledore. This will be just a lovely evening for you to have a chance to relax_—Riiiiight, and then stay up all night after it trying to finish up the homework we didn't have time to do because of the dinner—_and to celebrate. There will be live music, awards, dancing, and all you can eat buffet_—"**

"**You lucky bastrd!" exclaimed James, "Now I wish I had tried just a tad bit harder." He shook his head slowly from side to side. Remus snorted and Peter laughed, but Sirius was looking at the paper, his eyes moving from line to line, the smile suddenly gone from his face.**

"**What is it?" Peter squeaked.**

**Sirius bit his lip and then with a deep groan let go of the paper leaving it on the table. "Dammit," he said angrily, tipping his chair back and closing his eyes. His head was titled to the ceiling.**

**James frowned and grabbed that invitation. "_Please be aware that parents will be coming to celebrate with you this amazing accomplishment_…"**

"**I have to get out of going to this,"**

"**Okay, so wait, walk me through 'The Plan' again?" Remus asked holding the book "Magical Incantations Guaranteed for Life" book. **

**Sirius rolled his eyes. "Remus, _you_ are suppose to be the smart one," he remarked in an annoyed sort of way.**

**Remus pursed his top lip and looked down at the oak library table and muttered, "I just read a lot."**

**James laughed. "This is too difficult Sirius. We could never pull off this magic incantation," he told his friend frankly as he took the book from Remus' hands. **

"**That's what I meant by what I mean," Remus said defensively.**

**Sirius rolled his eyes again impatiently. "Whatever! Look, we can do this. We made the Marauders' Map, we are all animagus', and my uncle has a motorcycle that I, all by my lonesome, made iflyable/i," he told his friends proudly.**

"**Wow…" Peter said in awe.**

"**That's right," Sirius told him with a grin, "We can do this."**

**James shook his head slowly with a smile. "Anything for you, Padfoot," he said sighing.**

**Remus cut in, "But wait a minute," he began ruffling his hair and massaging his temples, "Where are we going to put this spell? I mean, it has to be a place where everyone will see it and a place where Dumbledore can see it because that's what we want right? We want the headmaster himself to see it so that you get in trouble for pulling another _prank_ so that you can get kicked out of the dinner?"**

"**Ah, now you caught on, Remy," Sirius said patting Remus' head with a smirk. "Any ideas on the place, guys?" Sirius looked at Remus, who had his eyes closed as he kept massaging his head, and then at James who was reading the book and making motions with his wand as though trying to figure out how to do it. Finally, he looked at Peter expectantly.**

**Peter's eyes widened. "Uh…Mm…W-why not the Great Hall?" He stuttered.**

**Sirius grinned widely. "Brilliant. Lots of space and everyone will see it. Hah! We will be remembered, men." **

"**Now to work!" James said in a deeper voice than his own. They all laughed.**

"**That's the spirit!" Sirius exclaimed.**


	6. Heads or Tails?

"**At least give him a chance, Lily!" Sirius exclaimed with exhaustion as he chased an irritated Lily Evans down the corridor. She groaned in frustration and stopped in the middle of the hallway, turning so rapidly to face Sirius that they're heads almost bumped against one another. Sirius stepped back in surprise, his eye brows raised and grinned. "So you'll give him a shot?" he asked.**

"**Let's try to get this through your thick head, Black," she started, her face red as her hair, "I-WILL-NEVER-DATE-POTTER. He is conceited, immature, just plain mean, rude, disrespectful, and absolutely desperate for having you do his dirty work for him every day of this week," Lily finished, each line more bitter than the first.**

**Sirius raised an eye brow with a smirk. "It's gotta break you down at some point. Besides, this week was my shift. Last week it was Remus," he shrugged. Lily shook her head impatiently and walked away from him.**

"**Unbelievable," she sighed to herself.**

"**Be fair, Evans! He's wanted you for ages now," Sirius told her seriously. **

**Not turning around, Lily responded, "I don't care. You guys have to leave me alone, I have enough to worry about, okay!"**

**Sirius ruffled his hair away from his eyes and made a burst of speed to get ahead of her. He put his hands on her shoulders. "What will it take?" he asked her pleadingly, "I want my friend to be happy, Lils, and you can do that. Now, what can I do? Maybe a date with charming old me would do it?" he suggested raising his eye brows up and down with a wise grin on his face. **

**Lily scowled at him. "Okay, how about this," she suggested pushing all of her books into Sirius' hands. He held them with a grunt of surprise as Lily reached into her pocket and pulled out a galleon.**

**Sirius made an awkward face. "I don't have money. I just emancipated myself from my parents, see," he finished with a proud tone in his voice.**

**Lily rolled her eyes. "Good for you, but I meant we will flip for it. Heads I win, and tails you lose," she said a hopeful smile on her face, "Now, if you win, I will go out on a date with James. If _I_ win you will go out with my best friend, and leave me alone about this whole James thing for the rest of the years that we live."**

**Sirius grinned widely, leaning down a little to keep her books in his hands. "All right! I even get a date Flip it!" Lily didn't mention that Sirius had always turned down her best friend, just like she turned down James. Minor detail, eh?**

"**Okay, you sure you got the rules? _Heads I win, tails you lose_," Lily repeated very slowly trying not to burst out laughing.**

**Sirius narrowed his eyes, "Just flip the galleon already," he said as though he was sure he could get this for James. Lily put the coin on her thumbnail and with a flick; it went up in the air. She caught it quickly in her hand, and Sirius watched carefully trying to make _sure_ she wouldn't cheat. Lily made enormous effort not to roll her eyes.**

"**Tails. You lose," she exclaimed with a grin. Without even thinking about it, she set the galleon on the top of Sirius' silky black hair and grabbed her books from him.**

**She gave him a soft smile. "I know you want James to get a date with me, but he has everything. Sooner or later that boy will see that he only wanted me because I don't want him," she explained as kindly as she could as Sirius took the coin from his head disappointedly, "Keep the galleon. You'll need it." She finished.**

**Sirius sighed deeply.**

"**Oh and Sirius!" Lily called out making him look up, "Your mind is your biggest enemy. Think about it."**

**He looked after her, utterly confused. He scoffed and ruffled his hair. Lily walked off leaving him there with the galleon.**

"**Pish posh," he said to himself with a smirk and he walked to class, "I have no enemies."**


	7. Disaster

"**Watch it, Sirius," James hissed in the darkness. Remus, Peter, James, and Sirius had all stayed up until the clock chimed with the twelve of midnight. It was time to take the plan into action. Sirius ihad/i to get in trouble for this. Besides the fact that he was up in the middle of the night, they would be doing something to change something huge in Hogwarts. There is no way he would still be invited to the honors dinner. He didn't want to be.**

**Sirius bumped into James again. "Sirius! Stop dazing off into the, what must be, deep thoughts in your mind. I don't want to get caught," he whispered irritatedly.**

"**Geez, who got your bonkers in a twist…" he muttered quietly. Peter laughed.**

**Remus tapped Sirius' shoulder. "He's right though, mate. If I get caught I don't even wanna know what mum's gonna do to me," he explained shuddering a little. Sirius gave him a lopsided smile and turned back around. He hadn't really thought about what his own mom would do to him if they went through with this…But it was too late to back out now.**

"**Hurry, Jamesy," Peter squeaked in anxiousness. Sirius rolled his eyes.**

"**Sirius, if you don't take your hand off my butt, I swear it, you will not be Harry's godfather," James said with a chuckle.**

"**You even have his name worked out! What if you are unable to produce babies, eh? And that's not my hand, I'm just walkin' a little too close to you," Sirius snickered.**

"**Ugh," was all James said. They laughed. "Here we are," James whispered as he opened the door to the Great Hall. They walked inside, the lighting was very dim.**

**James gasped. They were not the only ones in there.**

**"Stop," James whispered urgently to the troops.**

**They all haulted on the spot. Sirius bumped into James' back again, and he kept down the scream. Remus gulped loudly. No one noticed. Just as James sighed with relief, Peter's sneakers slipped on the hall and made a loud squeak. Sirius gasped. James turned to him furiously. Sirius gave him a very rude gester with his finger. He turned, still irritated, and Sirius was starting to get fed up with it. God, what was going on with him today? Sirius asked himself.**

**They all looked at the Gryffindor table where Proffesor Dumbledore sat, speaking to Lillian Evans. **

**"Your pride and joy, James," Sirius whispered into his ear with a grin. James gave him a small smile, the smallest that Sirius had ever seen him give. They listened carefully as Dumbledore spoke to her.**

**"Don't let me catch you out of bed again, Miss Evans," he told her nicely laughing as he did so.**

**She smiled at him and stood up. Dumbledore turned around to watch her go. Then, he stared straight into James' eyes. He gulped. He quickly turned his head to look behind him. There was probably something behind them. He flipped his head too quickly and gave Sirius' nose a blow.**

**"Ow..." Sirius groaned quietly in pain. **

**James gave him a pained smile. "Sorry buddy."**

**He turned back to Dumbledore, who was beaming at them. He walked up to James, leaving his cloak on.**

**"Whatever it is you all are up to, make sure you just don't ruin the nice, polished, wodden tables. We just cleaned them today."**

**With that he walked off. Remus, James, and Sirius all laughed and Peter just shivered with nervousness.**

**"Miss Evans!" shouted Proffesor Dumbledore as he left the hall. She turned to him with a soft smile on her face that James just loved. "Come into my office. As you are up and so am I...Well...I don't have to give you these news, but I should. It's not fair that you find out from the press."**

**Lily looked nervously up at him, but left walking behind him.**

**"Come on," Sirius whispered to James, "Let's get this over with. Hopefully he won't bust you guys for it, too."**

**James nodded with a gulp. What could be wrong with Lily?**

**Sirius noticed his expression. "I'm sure everything's okay, Prongs," he told him trying to relax James up a little. It seemed seeing Lily already calmed him quite a bit.**

**"Yeah, let's do this," James said with a sigh.**

**"All right!" Remus exclaimed excitedly.**

"**Oh my God!"**

"**Have you guys _seen_ the Great Hall?"**

"**Yeah, but who did it?"**

"**Only Merlin knows the answer to that, but whoever did is a complete genius!"**

"**Let's go look!"**

**The commentaries filled the Gryffindor Common room early that morning as the students awoke, from the early birds of five o' clock in the morning to the ones who rushed at seven thirty. The word was spreading, and as James was shaken awake by a small, frightened boy, a boyish smile couldn't help but creep itself upon his face.**

"**Jamesy! Everyone is talking about it. Are you sure we won't get caught? We can't have this happening to us in this year of Hogwarts," Peter squeaked anxiously with his hair all about as James tried to gather his strength. He squinted his hazel eyes and picked up his glasses from the bedside table, still smiling.**

"**So, how is everyone reacting!" Sirius exclaimed as he jumped up from his bed and excitement trying to fit his slippers into his feet jumping around the room as he strained to keep balance.**

**James ruffled his hair and looked at Remus who was already up and by the door to their dormitory. "You will not believe it," he said in a hoarse voice. His fellow Marauders looked up at him in wonder. Remus' face was white and pale, his eyes alert and scared.**

**"What is it, Remus?" James asked wondering what could be the problem.**

"Oh come on, Rem," Sirius asked stepping forth and patting Remus' head, "Don't look so scared, Dumbledore will never know it was us." Sirius laughed and shook his head.

Remus shook his slowly too and gulped. "Dude, it's so not about that.

James gave him an exasperated look and exclaimed, "Well, what happened then!"

"Yeah, Peter's gonna pee his pants soon if you don't tell us!" Sirius replied with laughter. Peter blushed and tried to stop twitching.

Remus sighed deeply. "The Great Hall does not look at all, guys, like we wanted it to," he started, "I went in for breakfast early this morning and it looked"

"Wretched?" James suggested.

"Destroyed?" Sirius put in.

Peter just trembled in the background. Sirius wanted to punch him just to make him stop.

"It looked _beautiful_." Remus finished, plopping down on the bed nearest to him with defeat in his eyes.  



End file.
